The Rise Of The Faux Consumer Union
Whatever your personal and political thoughts on unions may be, I think most people agree that workers should have the right to a decent wage and certain benefits that might not be guaranteed them without the collective power of a workers’ union.
As a former teacher, I’ve seen unions at their best and worst. I’ve watched them defend competent educators from partisan administrators, and I’ve also seen them protect the absolute worst employees known to man. Like socialism, the idea of what unions could be in a perfect world is not necessarily the result we end up with. In some cases, a few bad apples spoil the bunch.
To quote the Dude Lebowski who was attempting to quote Lenin: “You look for the person who will benefit.”
When it comes to most situations in life, looking at who stands to gain can provide insight into one’s motivation. When someone seems to care just a little bit too much about the plight of others, it arouses suspicion. We’ve seen too many seemingly-earnest politicians, charity leaders, and religious figures mired in scandal at this point to fall for that charade again. They pretend to care about an important cause only because they’ve engineered a way to benefit from that attention.
Which brings me to the rise of faux consumer groups in the whiskey world.
I spent a good amount of 2021 navigating a bevy of private whiskey clubs, each looking to maximize the power of its membership for an advantage in the retail market. Some were looking for help sourcing private barrels, others were looking to negotiate access to allocated bottles, but what all of them had in common was this: a designated leader who was clearly out to work the system for his or her own personal gain.
Imagine the situation: the COVID-19 pandemic strikes in March of 2020, preventing whiskey drinkers everywhere from socializing over a glass of Bourbon. As a result, virtual tasting societies organized via Zoom and social media begin popping up everywhere. After a few months of growth, the organizers of these groups begin working directly with retailers to supply these virtual tastings. In time, the orders begin to increase in size, giving these tasting societies leverage with certain retailers.
And that’s when the lightbulb moment strikes!
“Hey, I could probably trade access to my tasting society in exchange for allocated Bourbon or other free shit.”
And that’s when the mild extortion started.
I wish could post verbatim some of the cringe-worthy emails I received over the course of 2021 from tasting societies and faux consumer unions attempting to pressure me into their list of demands. It was embarrassing.
“You know, David, if we can’t get any Weller Reserve for our next event, I could tell my tasting group to shop elsewhere.”
“I guess I’ll have to tell my followers to find another store. They’ll be disappointed, as I’m sure you’ll be to lose their business.”
They acted like Jimmy Hoffa, believing they controlled access to the consumer pipeline, but at the end of the day behaved more like Jim Baker. Continually and without fail, these guys overpromised on their ability to actually drive sales, and underdelivered on their deliverables. If I helped them clear a cask from a distillery, they never wanted to pay for it. If I helped them connect with a vendor for an event, they never placed any orders for those products.
But that’s not because tasting societies and whiskey clubs are full of greedy opportunists—on the contrary! It’s because the people founding them aren’t really interested in the collective benefit of the group. It’s all about them and their ego. That’s the motivation.
I love connecting with groups of passionate customers who are driven to grow as an organization and create unique opportunities based on strength in numbers. Hell, that’s what gets me out of bed in the morning! But I’m finding less of that passionate collective energy since the pandemic started, and more of the calculative, manipulative cult of personality. These guys aren’t looking to create a fun atmosphere for drinking, they’re looking to become influencers who wield power. Pure and simple.
To quote V.I. Lenin: “Put no faith in phrase-mongering, it is better to see who stands to gain!”
-David Driscoll